No Bias. No Narratives.
Recap: A couple of nice rebuttals and heated punchlines by Xcel makes things competitive, but a cleaner, witty throughout and set-up/personal-heavy turn by Cable Guy gives the latter the edge in this one-rounder from Colosseum Battle League.
Verdict: Cable Guy (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Cable Guy – “You oughta be top tier, main stage, making classics, but on your road to Summer Madness, you got stuck in Traffic!”
Recap: Cable Guy and Stylez go at it in this PG matchup that featured plenty of fiery gun bars as well as some nice wordplay here and there to make the match competitive throughout. However, with a boatload of very average lines and pedestrian bars/schemes from both battlers, this battle turns out to be less than satisfying when compared to the hunger you’re used to seeing in most PG battles. So despite a pretty-basic-in the-first and taking-too-long-to-get-to-the-punch Cable Guy getting reduced to toast by his opponent’s ill stream of frenzied (“Glock 40 by the waistline with the beam, I got a laser disc, shit it shocked me when I shoot, it got a taser grip!”) gun bars in the first, before Styles delivers a huge miscue with his ‘Bret Hart died in the ring’ line and cutting his 2nd round short to defeat any chance of winning that round to a more wordplay and scheme-heavy Cable Guy. 3rd round exemplified the entire battle with Stylez dishing just enough of that gritty, street shit to even the score against what was a hot-n-cold turn by Cable Guy.
Verdict: TIE
Favorite line: Cable Guy – “You running around, think you tough with some camera crew?!, well nigga I got news for you!”
Recap: Well, Mack Mel certainly had to earn this one. That’s how robust with the punches, (“Without a pound on you, you as good as dead…weight [wait]!”) wordplay and set-ups Cable Guy was here. Indeed, a spitfire match throughout. A head-turning (“I don’t do too much talking clown, I just run up with the baby like ‘Look who’s talking now!'”) 1st by Cable Guy was only beaten by a braggadocio, haymaker-drenched, (“I get grimy, rusty can top, turn buck-50s into 1.90s!”) performance-heavy and (“Spine shot, man his chest poke out…like when cold water hit ya back!”) gun-savvy turn by Mac, before Cable Guy proved his mettle was unshaken through the likes of a just as fire and (“See, I’m like a Menace to Society, so he oughtta knew better then giving me burgers!”; “You known for being bun, so I don’t get what’s so special about the Sauce!”) punch-heavy 2nd round that beat back a (“I pull out shooting two, And 1, Ayo, I’m Sik Wit It!”) solid, but not-as-flexing turn by Mac. Split going into the 3rd, Cable Guy came through with another pronounced turn of witty personals and dope schemes. Still, for all of Cable Guy’s word symmetry throughout, it was Mack Mel, showing that he still had plenty left in the tank via a fierce 3rd that featured a plethora of stifling punchlines, gritty street chatter and slinging gun bars, altogether enough to edge the final round and get the win.
Verdict: Mack Mel (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Mack Mel – “Everybody always saying they connect is named Pablo or Chico right?, well my connect name is…head shot, that’s what I get if I say names!”
