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Dumbfounded

Dizaster defeats Dumbfounded

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Recap: Dizaster: “I don’t need race jokes”…then proceeds to spout mostly race jokes. West-coast vets Diz and Dumbfounded (who to be fair also kicked a plethora of Muslim barbs throughout the battle) meet up on KOTD for 3 hilarious/high energy rounds and it’s a close one with a whole slew of fiery (Diz: “His name is Dumbfoundeed, but he’s also known as Hannibal Lecter when he’s at the animal shelter!”) personals, lyrical darts, witty (Dumbfounded: “You thought I was gonna call you something like a cab driver, that’s stupid as hell, it’s 2015 you drive an Uber XL!”) bangers and fierce punchlines. But after an equally hysterical first from both battlers, the ever-aggressive Diz separates himself from his longtime rival with more haymakers as well as a gang of piercing rebuttals and amiable freestyles in the latter two rounds that allows the man from the Rising Sun to win the battle.

Verdict: Dizaster (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Dizaster – “You ain’t the type of Asian guy to throw a giant fireball, you the type of Asian guy that I would call if I needed help installing my firewall!”

Conceited and Dumbfounded (DEBATABLE)

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Recap: A couple of Grind Time vets known for their potent bars, jokes and witty punchlines, one couldn’t expect anything less than an entertaining match between the returning Dumbfounded and Conceited. Overall. Dumbfounded focuses on ready-to-order short (“You buy your guns at Baby Gat”) jokes, hitting personals and excellently turned Con’s renowned “Slow-it-Down’s” back on him without repetition. While Con goes for Asian jokes, nice schemes, a couple of Slow-it-Downs and his assortment of wild gun (“I’ll let the weapon give you hell, just like your fortune cookie you could the message from a shell”) bars, some landing, some not-so-much. In the end it’s Con taking the first with more variety along with winning schemes. While Dumbfounded edged the second round with a wider (“You gave imaginary guns, some peopel have mandatory ones”) array of fiery bars. Both scored pretty evenly while leaning heavier on the personals (Con: “You mad cuz my vies are climbing mils? I know that shit was driving him crazy like with you behind the wheel”) in round 3, but with neither really landing a haymaker, call it even.

Verdict: TIE

Favorite line: Dumbfounded – “He got 3 hot tubs at the cirb…all sinks”

Dizaster and Dumbfounded [TIE]

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Recap: The difference between going first might’ve played a part in this 2-round freestyle battle between Dizaster and Dumbfounded as the host ruled beforehand that Diz would start off round 1 before the two switched turns in round 2. So after a filler prone and a bit flow-challenged Dizaster gets easily beaten back by a punch-heavier DF to open things up, Diz returns the exact same verdict in round 2, thus making this one a tie.

Verdict: TIE

Favorite line: Dizaster – “I’m an Arabian terrorist because I always bomb your mom’s pussy!”