Recap: In another tourney battle from KOTD, Family Man Hays (fka Syahboy) uses a flexing array of spicy punchlines and piercing personals in the deciding 3rd round (had Dizaster edging round 1 and FMH edging round 2) to gain the win and beat back a pretty solid overall, but slightly redundant and not as consistently hitting turn from Dizaster.
Verdict: Family Man Hays (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Family Man Hays – “They gave you six battles in California?!, this shit easy as shit, they even bringing you grapes, nigga LeBron ain’t got treatment like this!”
Recap: A couple of Grind Time vets, Family Man Hays (fka Syah Boy) and Brixx, deliver a fire and competitive punchfest for the 1st round of this KOTD #GP2020 tournament. A bout that was also noted for its solid name flips, stinging wordplay and piercing personals, fter the two split the first two, a righteous at times 3rd by Brizz gets beat by the steadier hitting and more haymaker-lit Hays for the win.
Verdict: Family Man Hays (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Family Man Hays – “I got two .50’s like I just joined a Forex group!”
Recap: One of the nicest things about these Social Distancing battles is getting an opportunity to see some of your favorite battle rappers from the past come back and battle again. Such is the case with Syah, a battle vet who goes back to the days of Grind Time and now comes back here against Scotty for what turned out to be a pretty dope matchup. Scotty, fierce with the aggression, creative with the visuals and piercing with the punches/comedic bars, scores well here. But then so does Syah, who came equipped with a gang of flexing wordplay, righteous mayhem and fervent (“I heard Loso beat your ass so bad, he made you Christian!”) boasts that were consistent enough to earn a draw.
Verdict: TIE
Favorite line: Scotty – “Shoot the clip and die laughing…this a comedy skit!”
Recap: Bullpen Battle League in collaboration with Queen of the Ring presents another goodie as this inter-gender matchup between Bonnie Godiva and longtime vet Syah was chock full of salacious/scathing personals, stirring punchlines, witty barbs, some well-oiled wordplay and braggadocios darts. A competitive battle through and through, a more consistently spicy, funny and hitting Syah wins the bout after taking both of the opening rounds, before a spitfire 3rd by Bonnie avoids the shutout.
Verdict: Syah (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Bonnie Godiva – “I just wanna put my dick in ya throat, fuck battle rap, you got flavor but I only want you for the top and that’s Snapple facts!”
Recap: Every noted battle rapper must have a reference or two they get tired of hearing about from opponents in battles and in B Magic’s case I’d venture to guess that it’s ‘J Fox’ fight bars and ‘David Blaine’ mention’s. And while Syah made use of both those here in this RBE 3-rounder, the ATL spitter as he usually does, still made for a winnable effort with a gang of piercing punchlines (esp. in round 3, which he edged) and solid personals throughout the match. But as he shows us once again here, a prepared B Magic can take on anyone and with a steady barrage of sizzling punches/gun bars, rigid wordplay and witty darts in the opening rounds, one can attest here that the show did arrive.
Verdict: B Magic (W) 2-1
Favorite line: B Magic – “Think of the Banks family, I’ll raise the Smith [Smif]!”
Recap: Syah stays competitive with some nice name flips, (“They ain’t really want me to Black here, this some Oscar shit!”; “You should hire a new manager and stop staring at me for real, matter fact hire Norbes, at least he can tell you what can happen over a grill!”) punches and winsome (“Any thoughts of running up on me, just dead it now, I sleep with more .45’s [4, 5’s] and .9’s [9’s] than a pedophile!”) gun bars throughout his three rounds. But other than a close 2nd, none of Syah’s turns could stand up to Chef Trez’s ever-flowing (“Your mom’s mom dead, for grams of 40…moon rocks!”) heat and rich performance. Indeed, a constant barrage of fiery personals, frenzied (“You only talk, you ain’t about action, I know what dog ’bout, like a freak bitch on her period, you all mouth!”) haymakers, dope set-ups and fluorescent (“The gat spitting, but when this bitch touch you, you won’t catch feelings, I told him I’mma hit you with a clean nina, but gave him a dirty .40…I’m cat-fishing!”) wordplay that reminded us all that Trez more than belongs on the big stage–and that’s no gassin’.
Verdict: Chef Trez (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Chef Trez – “You been battling for how long and still got no fame?!, you John John Homeboy nigga…that’s your name!”
Recap: In this one-rounder from Bullpen Battle League, Syahboy spits some hot (“Put him to sleep like a Cortez battle!”) bars (including a dope Olivia Pope scheme) and altogether delivers a solid and aggressive performance. But a couple of redundant personals (I mean, Arsonal’s been hearing about the ‘school bus’ since like ’09 versus Conceited), bars that could’ve been more creative, wasted bars on other battlers and a shoddy ending doesn’t hold up when matched against Arsonal’s more steady unabashed (“This like the 10th plague, I’ll bring death to Syah’s firstborn, open up her stomach for him, now he getting worked on, your organs all in the background like this a church song!”) heat, winning (“You got the face of a bigga who mother still put him on punishment, nigga”) personals, rich set-ups/performance and a more versatile round.
Verdict: Arsonal (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Arsonal – “Fuck Marcus, your name Randy, you won’t let your K shine [K-Shine], you got that Rex swag!”
Recap: Highlighted by a trio of rare rebuttals-in-the-middle-of-the-round bars, DNA puts forth one of the most consistently superb 3 rounds you’ll ever see in battle rap to take out a mostly (“Your freestyle’s nice, but we don’t fuck with your writtens, I never met a toothless nigga that had trouble with spitting!”; “I’m official, Question: do you feel like trash? Clips standing there watching you get punched out, do you feel like Math?”) nice, but sometimes pressing at times Syahboy (who was probably still feeling himself a little bit from almost single-handedly beating DNA and K-Shine in a 2-on-2 battle with John John da Don earlier in 2015). Indeed, it was a complete showing by DNA: exquisite (“Y’all think this herb will peel on me?, y’all joking, he go to sleep and wake up to the ‘K’, Lamar Odom!”; “He don’t even know who to pop, his set DOA, but the more he [Maury] talk, he know not to test dna!”) wordplay, a wicked delivery, dope performance bars, delicious personals and fiery (“Send shots ya boo way, then have something dark liquor [dark lick her] D’ssue!”) punchlines that not only sunk any chance his opponent had of winning, but was probably the best DNA we’ve seen since the classic Dizaster battle.
Verdict: DNA (W) 3-0
Favorite line: DNA – “All your bars is useless, you think you smart but stupid, Immature, now You Got Served, that’s Marques Houston!”
Recap: Nothing too rich or extraordinary, but still a pretty good battle between Syahboy and T Money Bagz on the RBE stage. 1st round was close, but Syah’s splendid (“I’m ’bout the shit, you swing, I’ll dodge ya shit, I heard Money fake, so I’mma make sure these counters fit!”) name-flips and wordplay were more condensed and outshined an earnest round from Money, tho he occasionally took too long to hit the mark on his schemes and angles. However, after the first round it was all pretty much Money Bagz–a more versatile round of dope (“I be banging the metal like my weave stuck in the grinder!”) gun lines, wild jokes and hitting (“…my heart different like John Q son after the surgery!”) schemes in the 2nd and a dope DJ scheme along with more wicked (” I hear you be tricking on these hoes, Syah you be wilding, I give bitches hope, I wouldn’t give them soap”) punches in the 3rd. All the while, while Syahboy had some (“I draw on a whiteboy face, now you Riff Raff!”) shiners here and there and his delivery stayed aggressive, overall his bar quotient couldn’t keep up with Money’s Bagz.
Verdict: T Money Bagz (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Syahboy – “Every battle, you be talking that tough guy shit, same outcome, niggas ain’t buying that shit….Rain album!”
Recap: Syah Boy makes up for a couple of reaches with a barrage of heated punchlines mixed in with some fiery personals, witty (“I just left my drawers at your bitch crib…can I get my socks?”) anecdotes and frenzied wordplay. All in all, just enough to beat back what was a dope (“I can box and cook with the metal [medal]…I’m George Foreman!”), but not quite as versatile performance by Mack Mel.
Verdict: Syah Boy (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Syah Boy – “It don’t stop, I even had a talk with the .9 like ‘nah, don’t pop’, but the machine got a mind of its own, like I Robot!”
Recap: Damn: If only Syahboy came half as hard (“Your wife a slut bucket, try divorcing that, she put me on to the neck, that’s a torture rack”) as he did in round 3 (“I’m in the street with the Tommy like Keisha tripping”), he probably would’ve gotten a win here. But by then it was too late as JC’s fiery (“Dreams crushed, it’s a wrap for Syah, that’s King Tut”) bars, steady personals, wordplay, name flips and flat-out (“What I’m supposed to believe he nice and ignore the fact that he lost a lot y’all lying/lion on Syah, that’s King Jaffe in the barber shop”) haymakers easily gave him the first couple of rounds. Still despite losing, considering he was a last-minute replacement for Ah Di Boom, Syahboy more than held his own.
Verdict: JC (W) 2-1
Favorite line: JC – “Welcome to my ring Syah, I’m king, the chrome will spark, Tony Parker pointing with the 9 (who counted that), that’s 5 rings”
Synopsis: Ummm….no contest here. As Syahboy brings that cocky, Rich Dollaz-type heat (when Richie actually showed up to battles) and takes Neeq out to pasture with bars, jokes (“I see ya’ bitch I’m straight dot mobb, I’m ass grabbin'”), schemes and a superb performance. Not a body tho, what with Neeq (between a whole lotta filler) actually having some lines (“Contract killer, I put money on every hit like Pete Rose, but this an old-school ass-whupping like when ya’ mama caught you playing in your street clothes”) and Syahboy clearly stumbling towards the end of his round, but still an easy win nonetheless.
Verdict: Syahboy (W) 1-0
Best line: Syahboy – ” I don’t like talking, I should’ve killed this nigga at the chit-chat club”
Recap: Definitely not a body, but outside the fat jokes Syahboy wasn’t really hitting with any frequency while Big Kannon came with enough hot bars, schemes, jokes (“You been on 106? Well, so has Nuborn, bitch you have done nothing”) and wordplay to edge each round.
Verdict: Big Kannon (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Syahboy – “Your bitch gave me long tongue, Chuck Taylors”
Recap: Damn! I hate declaring ties, but after a couple of watches it was clear that this one could go either way with Syahboy clearly taking round 2 and Zay taking round 3, you’re only left with a very close and debatable round 1. Close battles usually make for dope battles tho, so in this case you can’t lose no matter who you think won.
Verdict: TIE
Best line: Lotta Zay – “…Wiz could leave ya with a wig missing like Amber Rose”
Synopsis: 2nd round proved to be the difference here as while Juicezilla (“Cuz my whole team gone clap, like we breaking up the huddle!”) stayed consistent and matched Syahboy throughout his 1st and 3rd rounds, Syahboy really stepped it up in the middle round, dropping steady haymakers, upping his performance level and delivering rapid punchlines (“You a I get punked ‘my grandma gave me that chain nigga!”) to pull away and take the win.
Verdict: Syahboy (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Syahboy – “I’ll give a nigga the 8 like his dimes is skimpy”
Synopsis: Not quite a body as Z.M. definitely had his moments, but Syahboy’s consistent display of elite punchlines, performance and set-ups (“Put a big X on ya head like tight ends on Madden”) put this one away with the quickness.
Verdict: Syahboy (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Z.M. – “I will run up in your son’s special needs class and sing to him like ‘Ya jawbone’s connected to my kneecap!'”
